I am almost 22 years old and have no idea what to do with my life, just dreams. I am the best female Krav Maga Instructor in my country and lead classes of mostly guys who are at least 10 years older than me. Krav Maga is everything to me. Some of my training partners are like brothers and sisters to me. I’ve been training for 5 years now and am still scared every time we spar. I destroyed my last relationship because I can’t commit myself to one person but I am not sorry and never said I was. I want children so badly, but not now – because I am too young, I’m still a child myself. I love my mom because she’s been there even when I hated her, and I love my dad even though he wasn’t there at all. When I was young I hated my brother, today I’m indifferent and our relationship will never get better. I am a feminist. I am a baker but can’t work because of an illness of my hands. I study sociology and philosophy, but the last one sucks. I always fall for much older men and they can’t say no to what I’ve got. I am pretty arrogant. I look into every mirror and watch myself, it’s an addiction. I love bruises, they are a sign of hard work on the mat. I want to be really muscular and strong but not a bodybuilder. I am a very bad friend and lost almost everybody over the years. I panic when I have to have an injection. I dye my hair because red expresses my personality best. I am actually not female at all and it bothered me for a very long time. I learned how to like myself by the help of a few friends,lovers and sports and today I honestly love everything about me. I have weaknesses, I can be very unkind, or stupid, or boring, or awkward, but also awesome. Love me anyways.